When we're kids, or in our early teens, we can't wait to be an adult. You can do what you want. Go where you want. No one tells you what you can and can't do. Oh, but how wrong we were......
Being an adult sucks sometimes.
Life can throw us some pretty gnarly shit and no one can take care of it, but us. Unexpected job loss, the death of a loved one, a serious medical diagnosis. There are lots of things that can turn your life around on a dime, but it's how we deal with such things that either makes us stronger, or destines us to always feel like a victim.
I could get started on how we've become a society of victims, always offended by something, always blaming others, always feeling powerless, but that's another topic for another day.
When something shitty happens, we need to stop and regroup. It's probably the healthy thing to do, but it's not always easy to do. Life doesn't stop because we lost our job, someone died, or we got a shitty diagnosis. Life just keeps on happening. The electric bill needs paid. The dogs need fed. The kids have to go to school. We have to bathe. All the usual responsibilities are still there.
There are times when I've had a rough day/week at work that I want to crawl into a hole and not be bothered....ever, but I can't. I can unplug for a couple of hours, but I can't disappear from life....as much as I might want to. I can't turn into a fragile piece of glass sitting up on a shelf, where nothing touches me.
I don't know if I'm angry there is no one who will carry all my burdens so I don't have to, or grateful that I don't have to depend on someone to take care of me. I'm not a piece of glass. I'm more like rubber. I can bend further than I ever think I can stand, but then I always snap back eventually.
I may not be perfect at it, and sometimes it takes me a bit to figure out what I need to do to take care of me, but I've been doing it for a damned long time. Whitney Houston said learning to love yourself is the greatest love at all. I'd add taking care of yourself to that. It's the greatest skill I ever learned....after writing, of course.